Tuesday, 30 October 2007

Ooo, 'Eck


I've been to this place once already.

I was late in today, because I got lost.

You see, it was like this.

Yesterday, I had the Google map and the written instructions. Today, I didn't bring them as I'd been there already. I'm smarter than the average, after all. I don't need telling twice. Do I?

This is a featureless, industrial estate, with almost identical roads, no landmarks, no signage and no one around to ask.

As the roads are very quiet outside the "rush hour", there are a number of learner drivers using the estate for practice.

Roundabouts. There are a lot of roundabouts. Instead of straightforward turns around blind bends and instead of T-junctions, there are roundabouts.

As I approached what should been a T-junction between the main road and the left turn towards my site, a BSM driver lapped the roundabout. He seemed very indecisive. Instead of turning left, I crossed the road (sorry, roundabout) to avoid the driver. I then carried on down the wrong road.

As the bakery is at the end of the road, it wasn't until I got to the end of the road I was on that I realised I was on the wrong road. When I walked back, I was looking at the junction from entirely the wrong angle. I guessed which road I was supposed to take. Luckily I picked correctly.

It was cold, I was panicking slightly and getting breathless because I was hurrying. I was getting wheezy too.

I was very grateful to see the gates of the bakery and the old toothless security lady on the gate shouting at a truck driver that he needed his ID. He was driving one of the biggest corporate trucks.

I was half an hour late. That's a day after I got the H&S talk and the "punctuality is extremely important" spiel.

Well. It's always goes to make a good impression.

My clothes are on the office casual side. I've got a handbag the size of a small weekend case. It holds everything that I would normally put in my jeans and nearly everything that I would have put in any bag I would have been carrying if I didn't have to have the handbag.

Everyone, even the Admin staff wear corporate wear. White blouses with black trousers or skirts. Any game of I - Spy with T for temp is soon over. So far I've been in black and black and blue.

All of today, there have been a steady stream of "girls" (adult women, everyone of them) walking in to the office to be fitted for the new corporate uniform for Admin/office staff.

Fitted up, more like.

The new blouse comes in different styles - long sleeved, short sleeved, fitted, loose, buttons, poppers etc - in the same excruciating shade of Santa Claus red as the trucks.

The girls are picking a selection of blouses for themselves from samples before an order is put in and the finished blouses are sent to the each employee. Each blouse will be "finished" with a logo and embroidery.

These new tops will be finished off with a black logoed fleece with some dangly thing swinging off the zipper.

Ooooh. Lurvely.